Win At Negotiating By Asking For What You Want And Getting What You Deserve

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Negotiating for what you want is a skill that anyone can learn.Getty

 

I’m a big believer in getting paid for what you are worth, and negotiating for it whether you are doing it in a job, a side hustle or a freelance gig. 

You can negotiate your rates, better terms for assignments, better contracts and rates, rights, payment and more authority in any process. 

As a writing coach, I teach my students it’s important when dealing with editors to ask “do you have any wiggle room to go higher?” You never know. Sometimes, the answer is yes. I’ve gotten as much as $50 more to 40% more with just that phrase. 

With every negotiation, it’s important to have a BATNA. That is defined as the Best Alternative to A Negotiated Agreement. It means walking into a negotiation knowing what is most important to you, knowing your bottom line (what you won’t go beneath) and the value of what you are negotiating. It means that you understand what your alternatives are if negotiations fall through, and that gives you power. For example, if you are asking for an extra $100 to do a freelance assignment, and they offer you $75 you can say, “I can do that, but can you assign me two articles, instead of one?” Or, ask, “Instead of transcribing my interviews myself, can I have the company transcribe them?” There is power in negotiating everything that is important to you.

Harvard Law School uses this process to develop the best alternative to a negotiated agreement:

  1. List all the alternatives to the current negotiation–these tell you what could you do if negotiations fall through.
  2. Evaluate how much each alternative is worth to you?
  3. Select the alternative that would provide the highest value to you (this is your best alternative to a negotiated agreement).
  4. After determining your BATNA, calculate the lowest-valued deal that you’re willing to accept.

Being bold enough to negotiate takes practice. It takes knowing your worth and not being defensive when you ask. Each time you ask for what you deserve, you build confidence. The key is to ask. Even if you don’t get the result you want, you can give yourself points for asking and putting your needs into the universe.

If you are afraid to even step up to negotiate for yourself, you might need to examine your reasons. Perhaps you don’t feel deserving of what you are asking for. It might help to write down why you deserve whatever you are asking for, so you don’t get thrown when making your “ask”. 

Finally, we all grew up hearing the phrase “you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” There is something to that. If you are polite and friendly when you ask for something, it’s always better than taking a defensive stance. 

Let’s say you don’t get what you asked for. At least you asked for it—hopefully, nicely, but firmly. Even if you didn’t get what you wanted the first time, don’t get mad. Get prepared. You will most likely get another chance to negotiate for what you want again. Just have your BATNA ready. 

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