This Isn't How I Wanted Street Trucks To Come Back

Think there are too many kinds of milk these days? Relate to the protagonists of Bon Jovi ballads with no sense of irony? Saddle up steel cowboy, and climb into this bitchin’ pickup truck with 770 HP and an interior to match your ill-fitting pleather jacket.

I love a hot street truck as much as the next Coors Light-crushing American–in fact, pour one on the pavement for the deceased SVT Lightning–but the Shelby F-150 Super Snake Sport here looks like a goofy Need For Speed: Underground reject. But if you were wondering how many nostrils is too many nostrils, I think, maybe, this many.

Somebody liked this idea enough to authorise 250 to be built, so, behold the fury of a 770-horsepower version of the Shelby Super Snake (now with optional four-wheel drive!) Hard tonneau covers I could go either way on, and I think we can appreciate the fact that this one is “different,” but the duckbill spoiler is wack and so is the wheel:brake size ratio. (That said, Shelby’s claiming a 0 to 100 to 0 mph time of 8.3 seconds).

This truck would be perfect for making loud and dangerous parking lot exits. Which, in fairness, is kind of what all street trucks are optimised for. It’s not how I’d spend $US93,385 ($136,521) but if you don’t mind slumming it with no supercharger and a paltry 395 HP, the base naturally aspirated ’Snake starts at $US86,085 ($125,849).